Last night I met a group of amazing ladies and I got into a conversation which I'd like to share. It has humour and advice which I think will make you smile on this snowy spring day.
Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you feel overwhelmed? The underdog, the opposite of confident and far from strong or proud. An occasion when you should logically be fine but crumble into something totally different. And you know that happens then, your brain takes over with all the negative wit it can muster, telling you you're not qualified, gonna mess up, not as good as everyone else, don't deserve to be there, can't do the task in hand. If you weren't so busy kicking yourself you'd probably marvel as how creative and cunningly hurtful your mind can be. I'm sure very few people could muster something more devastating than the contents of your own mind.
I've experienced countless examples myself, sitting in a meeting quiet as a mouse when I could have spoken quite eloquently on the given topic. Furthermore kicked myself profusely after the event at how unbelievably rubbish I'd been. This generated endless laughs as we recalled the devastation and shear skillful wonder of these situations last night. Great we can all have a laugh about it after the fact.
But far from a comical part of life these situations actually matter and do effect our lives. Maybe it's a job interview or a meeting which could change your life, maybe even the simple things which devastate our confidence and limits our abilities. So here's the practical yet enjoyable way of getting a grip before you crumble.
1) Before you step into the situation think about how you'd like to feel.
2) Ask yourself what would make you feel that way. Examples from last night were putting on a pair of leopard print shoes or imagining you're walking like Angelina Jolie.
3) Now you need a trigger, something which you see/hear/feel just before the situation eg pressing on the door handle, the carpet changes, the walls change from brick to glass windows. You could also use the noise levels increase or the air is cooler. Pick something which you'd notice.
4) Next imagine that every time to come into that situation the minute you hit the trigger you do your thing eg put on that pair of shoes, become Angelina etc. And mentally do this every time you come across the situation.
You'll be amazed how it changes how you feel and act. If nothing else it will put a smile on your face which always feels better. I think I may keep a pair of those shoes for myself :)
Let me know how it works for you.
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